My Taurus season to-do list, as a Taurus

An annual spiritual reframing of my AuDHD traits

I was sitting in a massive office chair in my family’s dedicated “computer room,” ignoring the screeching sounds of our dial-up modem as I connected to the internet and spraying Easy Cheez past my braces into my pre-teen gullet, when the AOL.com homepage appeared with an offering.

Just under Weather, and just above Sports Scores, I saw the term for the first time: Horoscopes.

Intrigued, I set down the can of processed cheese spread and clicked this new-to-me word, only to be greeted with a whole list of new-to-me words.

As an admitted tween know-it-all, this was disconcerting. I clicked on each new word in the list before me, slowly realizing that they referred to people born during certain date ranges, until finally I came to what I now knew was the “zodiac sign” associated with my own date of birth: Taurus.

You must understand, all of this took place in an age long before BuzzFeed quizzes and astrology apps, before the internet began to tell us anywhere near as much about ourselves as it does today. I was not yet old enough to read women’s magazines, and I’d never taken a personality test before (except for an IQ test, which this was… notably not). So as you can imagine, I was absolutely floored to see so much of myself reflected in AOL.com’s description of a Taurus.

A deep appreciation for physical manifestations of comfort and luxury. Dedication to the point of stubbornness. Focused and hardworking, unyieldingly obsessed with security and stability.

What the hell was this, witchcraft? How did the internet — no, how did the freaking stars — know so much about me?

It was the first time I identified with something outside of my nuclear family, something that was presented to me as so deeply intrinsic within myself that it could have been written before I even uttered my first word.

“I’m a Taurus,” I whispered through a mouthful of metal and rubber bands, testing how the words tasted on my tongue, practicing how nonchalantly I’d drop this new-found information into casual lunchtime conversation with the girls at school.

Years later, I’d realize that many of my Taurean traits were actually pretty obvious signs of my neurodivergence. Just listen to how Costar describes a Taurus:

Tauruses are oriented around the physical world. They tend to be grounded and logical. They love routine and they’re committed to their own comfort. They like to be in control. They’re patient and steady, and their materialism is an extension of their pursuit of stability.

Once they get into a groove, it’s difficult for them to get out of it. They like things to be predictable. They are perfectly happy eating the same meal over and over, or wearing the same outfit for a week straight. They would prefer things be consistent than chaotically good. They like to discover what they have the most fun doing, and then do it to the extreme. Tauruses can absolutely go on forever. They are tireless machines.

Tauruses are stubborn. They’re not going to do something they don’t want to do. They’re slow to change their minds because change threatens their sense of stability. They can become so set in their routine that they get too comfortable and lose sight of what really matters. Tauruses can become emotionally and physically lazy.

They can become stubborn and obstinate, and have a hard time listening to other people. They can be like a bull–stuck in the mud, and unable to see the bigger picture. Tauruses are slow to act, and may be too caught up in the moment to see the potential for something bigger. They can also be reckless, especially when they are young. They can struggle with over-indulgence in vices because they don’t know moderation. Once they decide they like something, they go all in.

Sensory sensitivities, hyperfixation, struggles with transitions, dependence on routines… Replace “Tauruses” with “Alicia” and you’ve basically got the neuropsychology report that led to my late-in-life AuDHD diagnosis.

Spiritual queers, forgive me, but I never did get much into astrology beyond that. I do still read my horoscope (read: let Co–Star bully me) once in a while, and I somehow managed to learn (through cultural osmosis, I guess?) the traits commonly associated with most star signs. But most of the time, I don’t think too much about the cosmos.

Until April 19 each year, that is — when I abruptly become a loud! and! proud! Taurus! for precisely 31 days.

Because if I’m being totally honest, this spiritual reframe of my AuDHD traits as something pre-destined beyond my control, something written in the stars that makes me the person I am instead of something wrong about me and my brain, helps me to be kinder to myself.

That’s why at least for this one month each year, I make an intentional effort to embrace the parts of me that I spent most of my life trying desperately to stifle. To appreciate my preference for predictability, embrace my cravings for comfort and pleasure, and celebrate my stubbornness.

Whether you’re a Taurus or not, I invite you to join me as we head into the season of the bull this month. Let’s luxuriate in little joys we’d usually deny ourselves and marvel at the world around us from the grounded perspective of Earth signs at one with nature.

Because we fucking deserve it.

My Taurus season to-do list, as a Taurus

Spring cleaning: Because we care deeply about how clean and comfortable our space is, and we deserve to come home to total comfort.

Fresh flowers: From the florist, from the garden, from the wildflower fields — wherever you found them, put them in a vase and let them brighten up your space.

Dinner by candlelight: Because no one’s going to romanticize your life for you, babes

Yoga classes: Something slow and grounded with deep, delicious stretches for every tired muscle in your overworked body

Gardening: Whether you’re tending to plants in your own garden, watering and checking in on your houseplants, going to a botanical garden near you, or ~gardening~ in the TikTok sense (or all of the above), ‘tis the season to connect with greenery

Scheduled rot day(s): Give yourself permission to do absolutely nothing for an entire day… or two, or three, or however many 24-hour periods you can set aside for rest and relaxation

Daily soundtracks: It’s called main character energy, look it up

Soft pants: Bye, jeans, we’ll be in culottes and linen pants and boxer shorts until further notice

At-home spa day: Choose your own adventure here — an everything shower, a candle-lit bath, a face mask, a manicure, a massage, you name it

Takeout: Order pick-up or delivery from your favorite restaurant and eat it from the containers on your couch, enjoying the fact that you won’t need to do dishes almost as much as you enjoy your meal

Pajama sets: Matching ones, preferably in a luxurious fabric like silk or Egyptian cotton

Farmers market: Fresh produce! Homemade treats! The opportunity to wear a cute little outfit!

Skincare reset: Swap out your old products for something new, or add in something you’ve been meaning to for a while — double cleansing? gua sha? under-eye masks?

Afternoon tea: On-theme outfits not required, but definitely encouraged

Reading spot: Find a place in your home or out somewhere in your neighborhood that you’ll dedicate as your go-to reading spot, then actually go read in it

Picnic in the park: Go all out with cheese and bread and fruit in a little basket, or just grab a sandwich from the deli or sushi to-go from the grocery store and sprawl out on a blanket in the grass

“The fancy version”: Wine or cheese or chocolate or ice cream or whatever your preferred indulgence might be, make a conscious choice to get “the fancy version” of it instead of the sensible version you’d usually get — the second least expensive glass of wine on the menu, maybe, or the fancy gelato you’re not sure how to pronounce

Karaoke dance party: Put on a playlist or album you love, then sing and wiggle around to it with wild abandon, on your own or with others

Dressed-up date night: With a partner, friend(s), or on your own, make a reservation somewhere you’ve been wanting to go and use it as an excuse to wear an outfit that makes you feel sexy. Go extra with your hair and makeup, put on all of your favorite jewelry, wear the shoes you’re always super careful with because they were kind of pricey. That’s what they’re there for!

Bedtime upgrades: Sleepy tea, a silk pillowcase, sleep mask, lavender essential oils in an aromatherapy diffuser, melatonin gummies, a bedside water carafe, cooling sheets, a sunrise alarm clock, that viral sleepy girl mocktail… Whatever isn’t already part of your routine that you’ve been thinking about giving a try, do it

What’s on your Taurus season bucket list?

Tell me so I can add it to mine, too!