For a short month, February packed a hell of a punch.
I started a new job in the middle of an intense second bout of COVID-19 I still haven’t totally recovered from.
I celebrated our dog Stella’s third birthday, holding love for her in my heart alongside grief for our first dog Luna, whose loss is what brought Stella into our life in the first place.
I stared at my phone, anxiously awaiting news of my new niece’s healthy (if premature) arrival across the ocean while my partner completed a work trip a continent away in the opposite direction, alone in both my apartment and my time zone.
Deadlines loomed. Executive function short-circuited. Muscles ached. Tears fell.
But mercifully—although it did tack on an extra day at the end—the month ended.
The sun is out today. It’s reflecting off of the disco ball in our living room, splashing bright polka dots across the walls. I opened the windows to let some fresh air in. I hear birds chirping and the sounds of bikes passing below.
The days are growing longer. The darkness is receding. More light is on the way.
March has arrived. Here’s to a better month ahead.
Reading: HOW TO BE ONLINE & ALSO BE HAPPY
If you remember a time when we actually used to log on and log off from the internet—perhaps from a giant office chair in a shared family computer room—then you’re likely the target audience for this book, too.
Smart and funny Australian author Issy Beech offers realistic tips for, as she puts it, “how to cultivate a conscientious and good-feeling relationship with the internet and social media.” Her advice is actionable, her insights are astute, and her prose is engaging and entertaining from start to finish.
I read this short-but-sweet book in one sitting and left it feeling (for the first time in a long time!) hopeful that I might actually be able to take steps to be less physically and mentally stressed out by my phone and by the internet as a whole.
Eating: TONY’S CHOCOLONELY
Did I mention that I had a stressful month? Because if I didn’t, then the pile of empty Tony’s Chocolonely wrappers in my office ought to make that clear.
The Tiny Tony’s are the ones that really get me. They’re just the right size for a ~*little treat*~ after I finally check off another thing that’s been sitting on my to-do list for an embarrassingly long time.
Basically, I’ve accidentally trained myself to expect a square of chocolate anytime I complete a task. Delicious? Yes. Sustainable? The jury’s out.
Playing: WORDS WITH FRIENDS
Yes, I hate the ads, too. But I’ve been playing Words With Friends since it first rose to popularity in 2011 and I’m not about to stop anytime soon—even if the only people who will play with me these days are my partner’s aunt and the mother of one of our best friends. They’re probably better at it than you are, anyway. (I said that so you’d find me @AliciaValenski and challenge me to a game. Did it work?)
Obsessing over: MY NEW NIECE
I’ve never spent more time on FaceTime with my brother than I have in the days since he and my sister-and-law welcomed their daughter into the world. Her arrival was early and eventful, and honestly, I think it brought us all to our knees. But she’s here. And she’s perfect. And I am counting down the days until my next trip back to the States when I’ll get to hold her in my arms IRL.
Recommending: SLASHOP BEDDING
I love our dog beyond words. And when we brought her home as a bald, neglected little puppy with mange and skin infections, I promised myself I wouldn’t ever complain about any future shedding if we could just nurse her back to health and help her grow her hair back in.
Three years later, hair from her thick, fluffy, shiny coat is all over our apartment, and I have absolutely not kept that promise. I’m constantly dusting, sweeping, mopping, lint rolling, and grumbling along the way.
But! One silver lining, if you can spot it beyond the mountain dog hair dust bunnies: I finally found bedding that doesn’t immediately get covered in her coat. In fact, it seems to repel it somehow (wizardry?) and it’s soft, silky, and cooling so I don’t get as hot when she snuggles right up against me all night long. Highly recommend it to any pet owner who’s tired of sleeping covered in sweat and rogue animal hairs. Here’s $30 off, if you want to try it for yourself!
Now I just need solutions for every other room in the apartment.
Treating myself to: SHOWER UPGRADES
For years, I’ve carried a quiet shame around my aversion to showering. But after talking to my therapist, I learned that between executive dysfunction and sensory issues, it’s actually pretty common for AuDHDers to struggle to keep a consistent showering routine.
My therapist recommended that I consider investing in products that would make showering a more positive sensory experience I can actively look forward to. So, I treated myself to some new shower goodies that are a bit more luxurious than my usual drugstore go-tos, including:
From there, I turned off our bathroom’s dreaded Big Light, swapping it for our Philips HUE Go light instead (set to “candle effect” for a cozier ambiance).
I hung a bath sheet, microfiber hair towel, and comfy robe on the towel warmer so they’d be at the ideal temperature and within reach when my shower ended.
Finally, I connected my phone to our waterproof Bluetooth speaker and slapped it onto the shower wall to set myself up for a dopamine-boosting shower sing-along.
And let me tell you, that shit worked.
Another day, another reminder that going out of my way to accommodate my AuDHD brain almost always makes things easier, not harder.
What’s in your February report?
Even if you’re not someone who enjoys “journaling” per se, this kind of guided reflection is a fun way to think about how you’ve been spending your time and energy lately. So, what have you been reading, eating, playing, obsessing over, recommending, and treating yourself to in the past month? I’d love to know!